Why women love jerks

I love holidays - I have just come back from Barcelona with my friends, and even though it was only for 3 days it was so good to get away. My last day in Barcelona, I escaped to the beach for a bit with my friend Becky. The beach is beautiful, I lay down on the sunloungers and look up and feel like I am trapped in a sphere as all you can see is the sky merging in with the sea. The sun beats down on you and all your worries float away as you close your eyes and take forty winks.

I also love holidays as it gives me a chance to read! I love to read, I like to relate everything I read back to my life somehow or try and apply it to my life, or use qoutes from books. At the moment I am reading a series of books called "The Christly Miller Collection" all about a girl who becomes a christian and her battles with her image, boys, friends etc. These books have really encouraged me, not just in my faith but encouraged me to "hold out for a hero." In the book Christy (the main girl character) is starting a relationship with a boy named Todd. Todd is a young christian man, who treats Christy beautifully, romance and all, but still puts God first. I truly believe that out there somewhere, there is a "Todd" waiting for me. I don't want to settle for anyone anymore, as I believe when you settle for anyone, you can end up falling for the wrong type of man.


This brings me on to my next topic in this post; "Why do (some) women love jerks?!" When it comes to romance, I get so needy, and get emotionally enmeshed so quickly, I throw my brain out the window. I foolishly make excuses and rationalise giving my heart away to guys who are jerks.  I have been that girl who ignored unbiblical behavior, rationalised red flags away and scratched things off my “list” because the object of my emotional attachment didn’t have those qualities. As a women, when my heart gets involved, I tend to lose all sense of logic. We all know of, or have ourselves been, the woman who dates the cheaters, the beaters, and the jerks. But she sticks with him because she loves him.  She tells herself that he has such potential, she can help him change and then she believes her own lies because she is emotionally connected to him. The book of Proverbs in the bible has alot to say about jerks, and I think it is important for women to read these proverbs before getting emotionally involved with a man to make sure he is not a jerk.

• Proverbs 1:7 - He is arrogant, ignoring the instruction, teaching and counsel of godly people
• Proverbs 14:16 - He is reckless and careless
• Proverbs 14:17 - He has a quick temper and argues over anything
• Proverbs 11:29 - He laughs at his sin
• Proverbs 18:2 - He has a lot of opinions, but they are not founded in scripture

So, why do women love jerks?

Because jerks – men who Proverbs calls a fool – do and say things to establish an emotional bond quickly, before their true nature is known. They make emotional promises that are not theirs to keep and in doing so sweep women with unguarded hearts off their feet. And once the emotional connection is there, very little can make a woman leave a fool… because she loves him.

Just because there have been fools in your past does not mean there cannot be a wise man in your future. But you must cut off ties with fools and surround yourself with wise, godly people. Because “whoever walks with the wise becomes wise.” (Prov. 13:20)

So what does a wise man look like?

• Proverbs 29:11 - A wise man holds his temper
• Proverbs 19:11 - A wise man is patient and forgiving
• Proverbs 14:16 - A wise man fears the Lord and turns away from evil
• Proverbs 28:26 - A wise man trusts in the wisdom of the Lord, not in himself

I want to encourage every women to look out for a wise man, a "Todd".  Below, is the link to the website where you can buy the Christy Miller books as I really recommend them!

Christy Miller